I did not get a whole lot of questions but thought I do answer a couple before I turn in for the night. It has been a busy day, with packing and moving things around, lunch with my aunt and uncle what was lovely, making plans which furniture my dad is going to take what things my brother wants to keep and so on.
Picture pretty unrelated but Germany feels like real fall now with falling leaves (and a lot of rain).
So here it goes round one:
Do you keep up with a lot of friends in Germany?
Today I met with a friend I know from high school, but as we were sitting together over dinner we tried to remember when we saw each other last and it was sometime before the pandemic. It was really fun and we had a good evening but in between those visits we only hear from each other occasionally. I have one friend who happens to live in the same town as my parents in-law now, what makes seeing her a lot easier. And she is also the one friend who will get in touch with me and not the other way around. It sometimes is a little exhausting as for most friendships I am the one who reaches out when we are visiting. It does make sense because how should they know when we are in Germany any other way but most also don’t check in with me. It still feels like nothing changed between us in all the time we don’t hear or see each other but we also miss a lot of the day to day things that make up life and change you so sometimes I wonder how well do we really still know us. On the other hand it makes it really interesting because it is a little like meeting a whole new person each time. It gets harder as time passes living so far away, but I think by now I am down to the friends who will stay with me. I am not constantly in touch but I know who I can call on to meet up and they will have time for me. It’s an effort but it’s an effort that is worth it. I probably should re-read this when I am ever in doubt about it.
Did you play any sports growing up?
Growing up I took ballet classes for a year. There was this really popular TV show called “Anna” about a girl who wanted to be a ballerina. Do you want to take a guess why I thought ballet was a good idea?
I also briefly tried jiu-jitsu and table tennis but it did not really stick.
Did you play any instruments?
I played the recorder and recently picked up alto recorder a little. I played piano on and off and even though I enjoy it and still play occasionally it’s just for me as relaxation – I just never was really good. I know a couple of guitar cords. And I also played trumpet in the local church brass orchestra and looking back I liked this best for the community.
Home here and there 
Awww, Anna! I LOVED that show and guess who also wanted to take ballet classes for a while?? 🙂 (I never did.)
I also played the recorder and then later the piano when I grew up. I bought myself my own Yamaha piano when I was 17. I had saved up a lot of money for it. It now sits at my parents’ house and I miss it.
I can relate to what you’re saying about old friends in Germany. I still have a few friends that I keep up with regularly (thank goodness) but nobody has ever visited me here in the States (topic for another day) and I purposefully only reach out to specific people when I go home and visit… because as much fun as it can be to catch up with people you knew way back when I mostly want to spend time with people that are still in my life NOW.
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Yes, on all the points you say about catching up with people. At the beginning we actually got quite a few visitors the first couple of years but that has stopped completely now. And I do know that it is expensive to travel this way 😂
We got lucky on the piano front. We inherited an electric piano when friends moved and now I can play again.
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Ha – taking on a sport because of a beloved TV show is so relatable!
It sounds really hard to maintain those friendships, and I hear you about how wearying it is to be the person who puts all the effort into a relationship. It is nice to be able to pick up right where you left off in a friendship, though.
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It’s probably like that with friendships no matter how far you move away as long as it is far enough that you can’t meet on a regular basis anymore. I don’t know as I mostly only have the very far perspective.
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Maintaining adult friendships is so hard. I worry that when I call or text someone, I’m inconveniencing them, but I also worry that if I don’t reach out, they’ll think that I don’t care. It’s such a fine line. When I was a teenager, I don’t remember this being an issue – I just called someone whenever I felt like it!
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I hear you on adult friendships in general. Every time I think I would rather call then text I feel like it may be an inconvenience and I question myself. Teenagers nowadays though don’t really call, they just text and chat online as I learned from my teen…
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I don’t know that show Anna. Mhm was that like an 80’s thing. Because we didn’t have a tv until the 90 so … However, I can relate to the sports being picked based on a show. For me it was the manga/anime MILA the volleyball player.
Even though my friends are located in the same country it feels like it’s mostly me trying to keep in touch. Or maybe not. Sometimes I can take weeks to get back to someone. But I agree with Engie adult friendships are tough. For me even more so as I don’t have kids and it is always me needing to get somewhere. Which I get but still it is hard and takes a lot of time for just short visit.
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Yes, it was the 80s – good catch.
Oh why does friendship get so difficult when you grow up? I completely agree. Sometimes the spontaneous visits are best though. One summer we had an extra concert ticket and I reached out to a friend from highschool who I was not in touch with for ages and she came a long and it was great.
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One of my big regrets in life is not sticking with piano lessons; I think it would bring a lot of joy to my days now. Sigh.
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It’s never to late. A friend of mine started learning in her late 30s and she probably is better than I ever was 😉
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